Fight For Your Right To Partie

I have issues with language – spelling, grammar, punctuation, you name it, I have issues with it. My issues aren’t always based on the ‘correct’ use of these tools of ours;  I am not perfect in my use of most of them, but it still doesn’t mean that I can’t be frustrated.

So today I’m taking umbrage at the letter ‘Y’. Ooooh, ‘umbrage’, what a wonderful and sadly underused word. OK, blog-post within a blog-post:

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Eddie’s Word Of The Day: ‘Umbrage’

Let’s face it, when was the last time you used umbrage in a conversation? Never? Probably. Use it today, lots of times, and then it will catch on, and umbrage will be used around the world so much that eventually America will love it so much that they will remove the ‘u’ like they do in all words, and it will become mbrage. Le Siiiigh.

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Where was I? Ohhh yes, the letter ‘y’. Now, I don’t completely hate the letter ‘y’, it does have its place in society. One of my biggest problems is with ‘the letter y as a vowel’. It’s bull-shit. It’s lazy. It’s ignoring all of the great work that the ‘i’ and the ‘e’ do in this world. If you want to hunt down this lazy ‘y’, it’s the one you have to replace with an ‘ie’ when you make the word plural. ‘Calamity’ becomes ‘calamities’, ‘party’ becomes ‘parties’, you know the ones. So basically, the ‘y’ takes all the glory in the singular word, but then just can’t cut the mustard when it needs to add some friends, and so the ‘ie’ comes in to save the day.  What a crock.

Well, you know what? It’s time we brought back the ‘ie’ in all forms of the word. Whenever you see the ‘y’, break free from the laziness, and go with the ‘ie’. Really we should only do this with words that are pluralized, but screw that. The ‘y’ has been taking the glorie for too long – throw the ‘ie’ in everywhere you can. We already accept it in some words – we talk of a zombie, not a zomby, a cookie, not a cooky, and a brownie, not a browny.

So, it’s time to be sillie, scarie, and downright crazie as we fight for the real vowels of this world.  Spread the word – use the ‘ie’ everywhere you can, Facebook status, chats, depositions. . . everywhere.

Make EddIE proud.

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~ by eddie on December 10, 2008.

4 Responses to “Fight For Your Right To Partie”

  1. I take umbrage with you, good sir, for trying to promulgate the improper use of the glorious ‘ie.’
    Anyways, what if it backfires on you and people start missing the ‘ie’ all together? Like partys, and so on?
    Which is more retro, in that ye olde style? The ‘y’ just seems far more old school…

  2. Edit: LazIE. GlorIE.

    You’re supposed to be leading by example.

  3. Danielle – hmmm, I think olde english was littered with -ie endings – I’d like to blame America for the y-introduction but I think the homeland introduced the lazie ‘y’ after the Saxon days. Anyway, enough of logic, let’s go -ie crazie.

    And Missy, I could say that I was testing to see that you were paying attention. I could say that it demonstrates the task at hand, and how much we need to pay attention to the lazie y. But instead I will just reiterate: So. Much. Trouble.

  4. I used “ameliorate” in a sentence last week. It confused the shit out of the recipient. Or is that shite? I am now confused.

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